Robert Pattinson caught … drinking coffee   20 comments

When RpattzLawyer showed me this article I couldn’t not post it. It’s too funny 😉 This is a spoof article and not a real one.


Twilight star Robert Pattinson has been spotted drinking a coffee from a Dunkin’ Donuts dealer.

The actor, who is appearing in the upcoming Twilight sequel New Moon, is handling the cup of java like a person who is accustomed to drinking what insiders call “black gold.” Fans are worried that the actor and musician may have a caffeine addiction. The 23-year-old actor has not spoken publicly about the believed addiction but many speculate that he has a “demon on his back.”

Read more after the jump!

“Oh my gosh, I can not believe he’s drinking coffee! I feel so let down. So sad. I might kill myself,” said 14-year-old Allison Weilder, a self-described “Twilight nutcase.” “I’ve been following Rob since he appeared in the best movie that was ever made, ever in my life, Twilight. He seems so nice. I’m in shock.”

But fans aren’t the only one appauled by Robert Pattinson’s recent behavior. The National Society of English Teabaggers is equally angered about the new photo. “Mr. Pattinson is English. As an English gentleman, he should be sipping tea. Not engaging in vulgar coffee swilling behavior,” said a spokesman. “The NSET has categorically denounced Mr. Pattinson’s actions and no English Teabagger will be going to see his new film.”

An eyewitness to the event said that Pattinson was drinking coffee like a “madman.” This unfortunate news comes on the heels of another photograph of the star walking on a sidewalk in New York which devastated local fans.

“I mean, if Rob can drink coffee…maybe I should too,” pondered Jennifer Uyllet, a sophomore at Reginald Francis High School in Beaver, PA. “I look up to him because he seems so nice. He was great in Twilight and I have, like, no idea why he didn’t win an Oscar for it. After school, me and my friends are going to go to Starbucks and score some coffee. Don’t tell my mom!”


Posted October 30, 2009 by justfp in Robert Pattinson

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20 responses to “Robert Pattinson caught … drinking coffee

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  1. Pingback: Twitter Trackbacks for Robert Pattinson caught … drinking coffee « Thinking of Rob™ [] on

  2. Wonder how Darling Rob takes his coffee? Purrhaps with some sugar because he’s so sweet? Hmm.
    I just hope he likes it with lots of cream! I sure do! ‘licks lips’

  3. Oh noez he has a coffee addiction! Doesn’t he know that stuffs bad for you??? How disgraceful! I would never touch that stuff…..*sips coffee in secret*

  4. Well, maybe I just don’t understand this joke cos I’m russian. Explain me please whatэs the problem in drinking coffee??? For me all this article sounded like a nonsense…or maybe April,1 joke…

    • It is a joke, to me it seems because everyone is worried about his drinking and everything. Caffeine is addictive and people have mentioned in the past about his drinking. They are just making fun because he drinks a lot of coffee. It was just basically nonsense and written for a laugh. 🙂

    • It’s a spoof. They’re trying to point out how ridiculous people have become in observing Rob’s habits.

      That’s exactly the point, there isn’t a problem with drinking coffee.

  5. That is probably the most HIlarious article I have ever read!

    Ooh, he drank a cup of coffee!
    What has happened to the world?
    He must be a MAAAD MAAAN

  6. Yes how dare Rob do normal things. BTW Teabagging is rude. Google it if you are over 18. Lol.

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  8. Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha! *pause* Hahahahahahahahahahahaha!

    Oh man, working at a gossip magazine must be so fun.. do you even need a degree for that?

  9. LMFAO!

  10. I am so innocent, I didn’t know what “Teabagging” was and I’m an adult!!
    (I won’t add any more to that as young people come on here.)
    As they say, you learn something new every day.

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